sometimes i still wish that i had the ability to self-destruct.

everything is wrong. i feel like i'm being tested. how much can i really take before i fall apart? well i'm fucking overwhelmed with life and its constant disappointments. but i'm still wearing this brave face in hopes that things will improve. and they will. i'm just getting tired of waiting.

if i were a different person, if this was nine months ago, i would be ripping apart my wrists right now. sometimes i still wish i was that person. i cannot explain to you the comfort it always brought to me. but for now my comfort is found in best friends, my brother, our beautiful but stupid dalmatian, and a certain boy...

but the most comforting thing of all is the thought of leaving them all behind.

saves the day: three miles down
feeling v. tired