it was strange to see him. this man i spent so much of my life fearing. he was a symbol of strength, power, control, pain...fear. but now, nothing. nothing at all. he hasn't aged well. his almost black hair has greyed. he's gained weight. he is not the person i remember so vividly from my childhood.

he means nothing to me now. he is not my father. just a stranger. he can't hurt me. i'm too far removed. and he no longer uses cruel words towards me. he barely acknowledges my existence. and that is just fine. and when he told me i looked cute in the outfit i was wearing, i was speechless. i couldn't even utter a thank you to him. but one compliment doesn't make up for the years of abuse. the damage has already been done.

i don't want to see him ever again. he is useless to me. and i have no room for useless people in my life any longer.

coheed & cambria: neverender
feeling tired