things are so different when we're together. face to face. there's no arguing. we don't piss each other off. you're softer. and so am i. is this what two months apart does?

i'm a liar. it happened. and i said it would never happen again. but i can't help myself. he tells me i'm beautiful. and being with him just feels so good and so right. but...he's hurt me so many times. and he knows that he has.

i was holding him. and i kissed his forehead. why can't you forgive me? please, manda. and he started crying. i felt so cold. i had nothing to say. i want so badly to forgive him. but i can't. my heart won't let me.

one day i'll grow. and i'll be able to let the past go completely. but for now, i'm broken. and he caused it. and everytime he tells me it's over, but then starts it again, it just makes it worse. it just makes this harder.

i can't make it stop.